Monday, October 19, 2009

Alright all you fellow wise-crackers out there,

Here's the info on the play I'm doing in Costa Mesa, just in case some of you might want to come and support your favorite punching bag. Name of the play is "Saturn Returns", it opens this Friday, Oct. 23 and closes Nov 22. You can get tickets at So get off your keyboards and treat yourself to some culture.


  1. Conor, You're back one day and you're plugging your play. At least you're consistent. Surprise us some time. I hear it's a comedy. Can't wait.
    I fear that Frank's portrayal of JP as a man with emotions has caused him to retreat back into his shell. I apologize if my thoughtless remarks contributed to that. Give us another chance, JP, and I assure you that you'll get nothing but respect. Right guys?

  2. "Saturn Returns" this play was written and produced by General Motors and now we know that girth around Conor's mid-section is part of his costume — Saturn's "rings"

    I really appreciate the acceptance I'm getting here.

    It makes me feel open so now I can apologize for my part and the TC's part in causing IFPD to miss the deadline for its special assessments bill.

    If we were better people and a better paper, writing "good" stories like I read here, then then then they wouldn't have been too busy in August and missed the deadline.

    Veritas vos liberabit

  3. JP, You can't take personal responsibility for the failings of IFPD. However, if you had been more "positive" in your reporting like the other newspaper, which I understand is going semi annual after next month, perhaps the IFPD would have had clearer heads to deal with unimportant issues like special assessments to keep afloat. And perhaps if you hadn't personally dismissed B,K. form his TC gig a few years back, he and others he influences might not have as big a HO for the always objective TC.
    At any rate, glad to see you back on THE most influential literary endeavor in our beautiful town.
    One final question, If dear Conor's girth represents Saturn's rings, would yours be considered Saturn's bangle bracelets?

  4. Have know fear that I've been negligent in my surveillance on Frank. Patience and stealth yield great rewards. That wasn't an old Indian Widow unnerving him. That was one of the many decoys we've sent into Aroma to complain about the food, service and decor, in an effort to snap him back into a state of cynicism and peevishness. Since you're not here to do the job it requires an entire team of annoying customers.

    In retrospect, I appreciate your discretion, or at least your hapless attempt at it, at Brennan's cake and ice cream bash. I understand now, your concern about the rugrats; I mistook them for another litter of feral kittens that the staff at Aroma is always adopting. Oh, and it wasn't your wallflower manners that reminded me of my prom date. It was your rumpled plaid shirt.

    Yours, dutifully
    Art Farkle

  5. Dear Frank;
    Sparky composed this Halloween poem in your honor:

    Knock Knock
    Who's There?
    Flaming bag on the doorstep
    Flaming bag on the doorstep who?
    Better not stomp on it or you'll be covered in poo!

    (As you can see, Sparky, like most strongmen, is not one for fine prose. However, I think he makes his point.)

  6. Art Farkel,
    Now I know why I chose you to occupy such an important cupboard position. I appreciate your stealthness and discretion when it comes to matters of blogland security. I thought you would understand my reasoning regarding Kevin's birthday bash. Paranoid minds think alike. Please no more reference to your Prom date and me, you're getting a little to close to my personal space.

  7. Dear Farkel,
    Sparky is no threat to me. And that goes for his friends , Patience and Stealth too. I am impervious to your knock, knock jokes. They don't call me the teflon don juan for naught. You and your toadies can't touch me. You've gained an hour, sure, but thats because it's day light savings time. Want some bad advice ? Keep tailing me. Ever heard of grease trap snorkeling ? I think you might enjoy it or at least one of us would. But I forget myself.As a clinically trained BAD ADVICE therapist. I feel it is my duty to tell you that this hostility that you are experiencing has more to do with your unresolved feelings of abandonment in regards to Conor's absence. The truth is you need to see his play.Face your fear. Go and see every performance. He will not reject you if your heart is pure


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