Hey Lou,
Bullies back in school? Did you get hazed back in the day? Now I'm beginning to understand why you're so interested in Choral Music. Maybe it was the little notes your mother put in your lunch that invited the ridicule. Here's some advice, stop wearing the short shorts and cover up those flamingo stalks you call legs, then get a real job (digging ditches or something worthy of the name "man") and then, and only then, will you hear the "silence of the bullies", sweet Clarice. Sweet Silence, something that Elaine will never know.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
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Conor~ I love reading your blogs...keep Idyllwild laughing! We love you!
ReplyDeleteTo my advice gods-
ReplyDeleteHow does a working lady, wife of one and mom of three loose booty fat? I've tried this and I've tried that, down with diets! What is a girl to do?
-Baby Got Back!
Conor, Welcome back! Glad to see your lithium has finally kicked in. And how sad for you that you commented anonymously to yourself, above. So consistent with your narcissistic self. And this kayaking thing you're so obsessed with. It's just an excuse for you to pee in your pants. And how you're always trying to get people to join you. Hasn't happened yet, has it? Oh, I was asked to tell you that you're about to be 86ed from Cafe Aroma. The Frankster frowns upon people who hang around for hours and NEVER order anything to eat. Coffee doesn't cut it. And I'll have you know that I was, in fact a big bully in high school, did 3 years in juvy and those flamingo stalks, as you call them, were a tremendous asset to me during that time.
ReplyDeleteDear "gainfully employed" aka Lou,
ReplyDeleteFrom what I hear, the last fight you were in you won by a good three blocks. I guess those flamingo stalks did serve you well. As far as eating at Cafe Aroma goes, let's face it...you've been eating for the both of us for years. Three years in juvy? That explains why you happen to drop something on the floor every time a decent looking guy walks by. You should talk about peeing in one's pants. When you go to the beach your idea of wearing a rash guard is putting on a pair of Depends with an extra amount of baby powder in them. Hasbro has a new game coming out, it's called "Rock 'em Sock 'em Bachers". You plug it in and the two Bachers bitch slap each other until one of them cries or wets itself. The downside to the game is neither one ever wins.
Dear Baby Got Fat,
ReplyDeleteHere's what you do. Start at your ankles and begin pull your skin up taut along your body. When you get to your booty have someone slap it to break up the fat. Continue pulling your skin tight up the rest of your body. When you get to the top of your head you should have about nine inches of extra skin above your head. Tie this skin in a knot and cover it with a ball cap. This should remedy the problem. The only side effect is that your belly button may end up in the middle of your forehead, causing some people to confuse you for a Hindu. Should this occur buy yourself a 7-Eleven franchise.
Dear Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you appreciate the work Frank and I are trying to accomplish here. However, I don't know why people in Idyllwild would be so insensitive as to laugh. This is important work we're doing here... well, I'm doing here. Frank is pretty much dead weight but he tries. I love you too...and would like to love you more if only I knew who you were. Remember, we're tearing apart the fabric of society, one shattered life at a time.
Conor~Sorry to insult you with my laughter, I'm just a giddy person in general and people always told me to smile and laugh (even when I really don't want too) but it is my job to make others feel good about themselves! About the anonymous aspect...to find my identity I will most likely be playing first base Aug 10th, you will actually have to get off the Aroma bar stool to figure this one out! Let the anonymity game begin!
ReplyDeleteConor, Several people, all with superior personal hygiene and no signs of fetal alcohol syndrome, as do you, have asked me if you are serious about the thoughtless and mean spirited things you've been spewing about me. That question has started me thinking (no easy feat, my friend.) Is Conor capable of emotions and feelings beyond his little game of keeping his hands in his front pockets and jiggling them around? Your lovely wife is smart enough to stay away from you and never be seen with you in Idyllwild, I applaud her for that. So who is Conor? And more importantly, who cares?
ReplyDeleteI've decided to give you a break and just think of you in the only stage role I ever enjoyed watching you in. As Charlie Brown you were great. OH, my mistake, that was the talented. young actor, Ivan. Sorry about that.
Using RSS feeds to read blogs.
ReplyDeleteKeeping up with all the new entries (posts and comments) contained in the 6 or 7 blogs of the Town Crier is a lot of work:
1. You need to go to each of the pages of the separate blogs.
2. For each of those pages you have to scan the list of posts.
3. For each of those posts you have to check the number of comments and decide if the number is larger that the number you remember on your last visit (remember!! I can barely remember my name these days!!)
4. Click on comments if you want to read them.
For all the other blogs I am following on the internet I am using their very convenient RSS feeds.
At first I was very surprised to see that the Town Crier blogs did not mention how to connect to their RSS feeds but I now realize that everything is there under a different label: "Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)" which is located at the very bottom of each blog page.
Let me give here my recipe to set the Town Crier RSS feeds using the Safari browser:
1. In "Bookmarks" >> "Show All Bookmarks" create a folder named "TC_RSS" in the "Bookmark Bar" collection.
2. Put a check mark in the column "Auto-click" for that folder.
3. Visit the page "http://frankandconor.blogspot.com/"
4. On the bottom of the page click on " Posts (Atom)"
5. With the new page (the RSS feed for frankandconor) go to "Bookmarks" >> "Save Bookmarks" and save the page in the folder "TC_RSS" of the "Bookmark Bar"
6. Repeat Steps 3,4 and 5 for each the other blog pages which interests you.
You are done!
From now on you can keep up with ALL the RSS feeds of your chosen blocks by giving a short click to "TC_RSS" in the "Bookmar Bar".
If you click and hold on "TC_RSS" you can restrict your choice to the RSS feed of a single blog.
Dear Bro's, Any comment about the above, well intended, but 21st century concept?
ReplyDeleteDoes this Jetson person not realize that we are content in our backward, incestuous little town where one or two men have fathered most of the natives?
I sense a part timer trying to upgrade our lifestyle. I suggest they lease and operate one of the empty restaurants. That doesn't look too hard to do. Perhaps they can even have a "TC_RSS" blog. Nice.
Whoa now, settle down "You are done"
ReplyDeleteThis techno-anonymous makes a lot of sense. The way this blog is structured sucks. He's right, I just don't quite understand his fix. I was born in the mid twentieth century and pong came out in my early twenties.But I would love someone to reorganize our blog to make it easier.
Gentlemen,Please, this TC_RSS stuff is obviously just more bad advice.
ReplyDeleteWhich is the the whole point anyway. Think of it as more bang for your blog. You didn't hear it from me, but it is my understanding that the world will be ending soon(sometime around 2012),so why not enjoy TC_RSS while we still can.
I just got back from vacation and a quick perusal of recent posts show that Frank is indeed dead weight, writing only one post to about ten of Conor's. Now, this might just be because Frank has a real job, but I'm also wondering if his popularity is sliding. Frank's posts, I've noticed, tend to be gently witty and thoughtful, unlike Conor's, which are precisely written to send readers to either therapy, skid row or reality television. Frank, if you're really in the bad advice business, you're going to have to step it up.
ReplyDelete