Friday, September 11, 2009

Our mailboxes are filled with posts from distressed Frank and Conor fans who are distraught over the announcement of Becky Clark's impending retirement from the editorship of the Town Crier... well one post...from Bobcatty...but Bobcatty is really really upset and wonders how we can dig any deeper into our despair. Well Bobcatty, let me say I feel your pain. (or maybe it's just gas) This is a time we all must huddle together for warmth from the chilling winds of the approaching Winter... a Winter without the incessant "pot stirring" of our beloved Editor. Huddle my friends (preferably at my place) and share your burdens with each other. It is in this huddling, Bobcatty, that you will be able to sound the depth of your despair and by sounding it I don't mean recording on a cheap yard sale tape recorder and then playing it back for family and friends between the Thanksgiving turkey and the pumpkin pie, no I mean dig deep, deeper than you've ever dug before and then, and only then, will you know what it means to be and elfen-like creature. For it was the elves that first taught us to dig deep. So Huddle Bobcatty, huddle and dig... and soon at the Town Crier, just like the mighty Poseiden, there will be "a morning after".

20 comments:

  1. Conor, you're right! We made it through the night till the morning after and we're all still intact.
    We're over the Town Crier Breaking News.

    Next Question, please.

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  2. Dear READY TO MOVE ON,
    Conor is right, we did make it through the night. But we still have along way to go. Like the Vietnam war or under cooked beans, the repercussions of Becky Clarks retirement may not be felt for sometime. I for one , will miss her and I know many others like me and others that want to be like me and still others that actually want to be me , will also miss her "Bite Me" biting wit every week. Perhaps, editor Clark's resignation , like the Holocaust or man's walk on the moon is just a ploy set up to mislead the american public and sell more Town Criers.

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  3. Dear F and C, At an informal meeting of a handful of A list, movers and shakers in town today, the consensus was that Frank and Conor should be the new co-editors of the TC.
    Talk about increased newspaper sales, objective reporting and a good sense approach to the town's activities, I believe it's a smashing idea. Advertisers would be knocking down the door to get in on this wonderful, new regime. The TC would see real profit. Unlike the last 10,000 words of the TC press release. A much needed fresh approach that would have the full support of the town. Whatta you think guys?

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  5. Dear Self proclaimed A list, movers and shakers,
    Thank god you've finally arrived in Idyllwild. I don't know how we've made it this far without you. Just kidding , were doing fine. I hear Beaumont is in trouble though. Why don't you jet set on down there. Go save them. I'll wait here with Jamie & the other hillbillies where I belong

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  6. Frank, So I take that as a YES to the job offer? Congratulations.

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  7. Dear Idyllwild Part Timer,
    Obviously you are a part timer or you would know that Conor and I already belong to an Idyllwild secret society that controls everything up here. The group of desicion makers that I'm talking about is so important and elite that we don't even have a letter before our list rating . We're the ones that gave Becky permission to retire in the first place. We've been running the towncrier for years . In fact ithe newspaper was my idea . Conor is the one that told Vic Sirkin to lose weight and I'm the one that would'nt let the ICRC spell it's title phonetically "the EYE SEA ARE SEE ?" Are you kidding me ? come on !
    Idyllwild has been beautiful place to watch my children grow up. My advice to you is to do the same.

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  8. Dear Frank,

    I guess Vic S. didn't take Conor's advice. Other than that I see the truth in your other remarks. You definitely do NOT lie.

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  9. Dear F&C,
    Will this dramatically increase or decrase the amount of knitted items created in Idyllwild?

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  10. Dear Observer,
    We have no plans to discontinue knitting production at this time.
    What do you need?

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  11. Dear Frank and Conor;
    If you're truly heads of the "Secret Society," why did you let them close the dump that extra day? My Wednesday social life is no longer down in the dumps, but is spent in a pricey coffee shop uptown. Just the other day I got into a conversation about Nietsche with a guy who was throwing away his daughter's old training potty... Oh wait, that was at the coffee shop.

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  12. Dear Fred and Colon:
    I agree with butt-still. If you're the muckety-mucks you claim to be, why did you let the town square be converted into that Roy Rogers reject Frontierland Fort. There's not even gun turrets! So what the hell are we supposed to do in the event of a siege! Have Colon pepper the invading flatlanders with bad jokes? Now, with the square gone, there's no place for drunks to hang out except on citizen community boards!

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  13. Dear Mr. Farkel,
    First of all we have to come to an understanding, Are they Invading flatlanders or are they tourists? If they are invading flatlanders, I agree gun turrets are appropiate. But if they are tourists, paint ball gun turrets would make more sense and also provide an excellent recreation activity for our Idyllwid's bored youth.

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  14. No, not paint ball guns, water cannons... We all know the main reason people come here is that we have better weather. In the summer the water cannons will help cool off the tourists and in the winter we can use them to create giant ice sheets around the fort so we can watch in glee as they spin their two wheel drive monster trucks out of control.

    We locals could then use them year round as a sort of drive by car wash as well. They'd have even more uses than last week's town crier.

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  15. Dear F and C,

    We've been doubly blessed with two new bloggers. With Frank leaving town for a week, we're stuck with Colon to try to hold onto them with his form of wit and humor. Hope we can keep their interest.
    Travel safely friend, the town needs you. Hurry back.

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  16. Congratulations Water lover, It is ideas like these that show us all what Idyllwild could be someday if and only if we can stop the bickering. Put back the original tree monument, I say. We can make it a giant ring toss, using the monster truck tires that would otherwise be litering our streets after the water canons have been deployed. We could launch them from the second floor of the fort using a cheaply constructed monster tire catapult. Public executions of locals that bug me would also be a great tourist draw. I've already put together a short list. We could do it just before the tree lighting ceremony every year.

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  17. Dear Frank;
    Public executions! Excellent! I've been writing to Jeff Stone with that request for years. Weirdly, he doesn't respond.
    But how will we decide who makes the cut, so to speak?

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  18. Dear Bobcatty,
    It could give the term" Idyllwild A-lister "the meaning that it truly deserves. I wouuld enjoy that.

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  19. Dear IPt,
    The name is Conor, use Colon again and I'll give you a proper blogging flogging. I'll try my best not to sink the ship while Frank is gone. It will be tough considering my "form of wit and humor". But, I'll try my best to satisfy your thirst for meaningful yet humorous observations.

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  20. May I ask a Question? I am seeking advice, preferably good advice but you gatta have something to contrast with. Do I just ask and you answer? Is that how this works?

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